Gents without Cents(Next Generation Yaoi and Yuri Kids style)
by DanekoTheOtakuCat
Summary: A new Gents without Cents spoof starring Bombard(My Sonadow Kid) as Moe, Plutonium(My KnucklesxSilver Kid) as Larry, Mars(My OCxOC/FlamesxSpace Kid), and Tenki(My Toyomi Kid), Maru(My Kagaki Kid) and Hikari(My KaorinxChihiro Kid) as Loe, Marry, and Shirley. Plus, Takashi Takeda(Jumbo) as Mr. Manny and Asagi Ayase as Mr. Manny's Assistant. Bombard/Tenki, Plutonium/Hikari, Mars/Maru.


_Gents Without Cents_(Sonic Yaoi Couples and Azumanga Daioh Yuri Couples' Kids Style):

By Danny Emory(OtakuDanny/_オタクダニー_)

In the apartment, Bombard, Plutonium and Mars are practicing their routine.

" Pick it up again on Pg. 9." said Bombard and the routine starts.

" Aha!" said Bombard and Plutonium. "Slowly I turn...And step-by-step...inch-by-inch..." But the routine was interrupted when they noises upstairs.

" Again for the 5th time!" said Bombard angrily.

" The minute we get to that inch-by-inch line, something always happens!" said Plutonium. Just then, A chandelier falls and hit Mars on the head. Mars has had enough.

" That's the last straw!" said Mars.

" Come on! We're going upstairs and kill those mugs!" said Bombard.

" Boy, you said it! I like to hit their heads and-" Mars accidentally hits Bombard on the hit with a bat. " Sorry about that." Mars sweatdropped.

" See that?" said Bombard, clenching his fist. Mars looked at it and Bombard hits him on the hit with a bat. " Come on! We'd better get going!" said Bombard. Plutonium laughed.

" _See that?_ Ha! Ha! Ha!" said Plutonium.

" You too, Ran-in-the-face! Come on!" Bombard said and grabbed Plutonium on the fur. At upstairs, They found where the noise is. " This must be it." said Bombard.

" I'll show them!" said Mars.

" Shut up. I'll punch their guts, I'll rip their head off! And if there's a big, muscular guy here, You take care of him." said Bombard that made Plutonium and Mars nervous. But when they opened the door, It turned out to be 3 girls, dancing. The boys were surprised.

" I guess they dance pretty good." Mars whispered.

" Meh." Bombard said. Just then, Mars looked at the record player and starts spinning his head. But Bombard stopped it. When the girls finished dancing, They saw Bombard, Plutonium and Mars, standing there.

" Who are you and what are you doing here?" said the brown-haired, Light Blue eyes girl.

" Well, we came here to break your necks." said Plutonium.

" Oh yeah?" said the girls, rolling up their sleeves. But the boys stopped them.

" Wait a minute! We were in the middle of our routine..." said Mars.

" We heard noises and..." said Plutonium.

" And the chandelier hit my head." said Mars.

" Oh my! What an awful lump!" said the dark blue haired girl.

" That's no lump, That's my head. Ha! Ha!" Mars blushed.

" We're sorry." said the dark blue haired girl.

" I'm glad. Otherwise, we would've met!" Mars smiled.

" I'm Bombard The Hedgehog, The Son of Sonic and Shadow." said Bombard.

" I'm Plutonium The Hedgechidna, The Son of Knuckles and Silver." said Plutonium.

" And I'm Mars The Fiery Alien Hedgehog, The Son of Flames and Space!" said Mars. The girls are surprised.

" Nice to meet you! I'm Tenki Mizuhara, The Daughter of Tomo and Yomi." said Tenki.

" I'm Maru Kagura, The Daughter of Masamune and Ryoko." said Maru.

" And I'm Hikari Suzuki, The Daughter of Kaorin and Chihiro!" said Hikari.

" How do you do?!" they said and shook hands.

" Oh boy! Somebody's gonna get married! I hope..." said Mars and blushed at Maru. Just then, The boys started combing their fur.

" So you boys are actors, huh?" said Hikari.

" What do you for acting?" asked Maru.

" Oh, sort of acting for the show." said Mars.

" Yeah, It's a big thing!" said Plutonium.

" Yes, It's the greatest thing we ever do. But! There's only one line that we always do! We'll show ya!" said Bombard and the boys get ready for their routine again. " Pick it up again at Pg. 9." said Bombard. The routine starts again.

" Ah! Slowly we turn...And step-by-step...inch-by-inch..." But the part was interrupted again when Mars feel into a bathtub. Bombard and Plutonium got irritated.

" You numbskull!" said Bombard.

" Yeah, If we ever get that inch-by-inch line, We would've done better!" said Plutonium and they threw their scripts down on the floor.

" What are ya sittin' in there for?!" said Bombard.

" So it should've been tough, I'm taking a bath!" said Mars.

" A bath!" said Bombard.

" Yeah!" said Mars and Bombard and Plutonium decided to join in.

" Move over! I could go for a scrubbin'." said Bombard and they got in the bathtub. " Pass over the soap." said Bombard and they took a bath. After that, They went to Mr. Takeda's studio to perform.

**Song:**

_We didn't come to borrow any money,_

_We didn't come to borrow any dough,_

_We didn't come to borrow any trouble,_

_We just come here to say 'hello!'_

_Oh!(Plutonium)_

_Oh!(Bombard)_

_Oh!(Mars)_

_Hello to you, Mr. Takeda!_

_We just come to see ya,_

_We just got back from Osaka,_

_We just come here to say 'hello!'_

_Oh boy, You said it!(Mars)_

_We just come here to say 'hello!'_

_And don't forget it!(Mars)_

_We just come here to say 'hello!'_

_And I'm a-(Mars, but interrupted)_

_Helloooooooo!(Bombard and Plutonium)_

**Song Ended**

" Hello!" said Mars.

" Good-bye!" said Jumbo, disappointed.

" Now don't get hasty, Mr. Takeda. The best has yet to come!" said Bombard.

**Song#2:**

_This is a sad, sad story...(Bombard)_

_Boo hoo, hoo , hoo!(Mars and Plutonium)_

_...Of a boy and all his glory!(Bombard)_

_Boo hoo, hoo, hoo!(Mars and Plutonium)_

_He could...ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay, ratatooonea, onea, onea...(Interrupted)_

_Bay rum.(Mars)_

_ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay..._

_ratatoolaylay! Oh my! Oh please! Oh my!(Plutonium)_

_ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay..._

_ratatoo-push 'em up! Ratatoo-push 'em up!(Mars)_

_ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay..._

_ratatoo-Yahoo! Ratatoo-Yahoo! Ratatoo-Yahoo! Ah! Devolved and determined!(Bombard)_

_ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay, ratatoolaylay...(Interrupted)_

**Song Ended**

" Spread out!" shouted Bombard. " Now comes the climax!" said Bombard again and they started again.

" Aha! Slowly I turn..." said Bombard and Plutonium.

" Ratatoolaylay!" said Mars.

" ...And step-by-step...inch-by-inch..." But got interrupted again when Mars fell down again. Mars smiled and waved.

" I fall down!" said Mars. They got him back up and Mars' hand got stuck in the spit bucket.

" And now you had to kill the act." said Bombard. Mars tries to get it out.

" I couldn't help it! It slipped!" said Mars.

" Look, we're sorry, Mr. Takeda. It's just that-" said Bombard, but was interrupted when Mars got it out and accidentally hits Bombard on the face.

" Sorry!" Mars sweatdropped. Just then, Bombard lost his temper and started beating Mars.

" Hey, Break it up! Break it up!" said Jumbo.

" Look, We're sorry, Mr. Takeda. It's just that every single time this imbecile-" said Bombard, but was interrupt again when Asagi appeared.

" Jumbo, The dock is having a show and they want you there." said Asagi.

" Thank you. I'll be there." said Jumbo and Asagi left. " Sorry, boys, but I'm in a bit of a hurry. Better see me again some other time." said Jumbo. Just then, They had an idea.

" Say, Mr. Takeda. Why can't we have a show over there. We'll slay 'em!" said Bombard.

" We'll kill them!" said Plutonium.

" We'll annihilate 'em!" said Mars. Just then, Jumbo couldn't argue with it.

" Okay. I'll take a chance. But you'd better be good!" said Jumbo.

" We get ya." said Bombard. At the dock, Bombard, Plutonium, and Mars' routine are finally started on stage. It started when Mars and Bombard walked by each other and looked at each other as well.

" Hiya, pal!" said Mars. Bombard was surprised.

" You called me _pal_? Boy, I haven't heard that name for years! You know, bub, I was a champ like you." said Bombard.

" Oh, Congratulations!" said Mars, but was interrupted.

" Ah, but it wasn't always. I can look back at the day when I was a very happy married man...And one day, that rat came and took away all the happiness and glory! I'll never forget that. I just got home from the graveyard shift. And there was a note on the window." said Bombard.

" What did it say?" asked Mars.

" Oh, it was one of those cold-blooded notes. _Dear Bombard, I'm running away with Plutonium._ And for that, I must find him...a trail lead me to Pittsburgh. I travel to find him and have my revenge! Now on with the chase! Miami! Dallas! New Arlean! Then I come face-to-face with the rat that ruined my life...It was in Niagara Falls...**Niagara Falls!** Slowly I turn...And step-by-step...inch-by-inch...I walked up to him and I slapped him, I hit him, I punched him, I tear him to pieces...and I knocked him down!" said Bombard and punched Mars. Mars got up.

" Oh take it easy, kid! Take it easy!" said Mars.

" Sorry, kid. It's that word Niagara Falls. Every time I tell it, It fall me apart." said Bombard.

" Don't do me good either. Ungrateful, that's what it is. How do you like that guy? I said _Hello, pal_, listen to him, and tell him Niagara Falls-" Mars said accidentally.

" _**NIAGARA FALLS!**_" Bombard shouted. Mars panicked. " **SLOWLY I TURN...AND STEP-BY-STEP...INCH-BY-INCH! I SMACKED HIM, I HIT HIM, I PUNCHED HIM, I TEAR HIM TO PIECES...AND I KNOCKED HIM DOWN!**" yelled Bombard. Mars got up again.

" Oh take it easy, kid! Take it easy!" said Mars.

" It's that women. I'll kill her...and him! Blood?" Bombard looks down the stage. " **AAAAHHH! RIVERS OF BLOOD! POOLS OF BLOOD! AHHAHAHAHAHAHA!**" Bombard said insanely and left. Mars brushed himself and bumped into Plutonium.

" Pardon me, pal." said Mars. Plutonium was surprised.

" Did you call me _pal_?" asked Plutonium. Mars was shocked. " Boy, I haven't heard that name for years!" said Plutonium.

" You too? Haven't you got any friends either?" asked Mars.

" That's what I came from! The dirty rat! He tried to take her away from me! Ah! But he couldn't! So he trailed me..." said Plutonium.

" ...To Pittsburgh?" asked Mars.

" Yes." said Plutonium. Mars was even more shocked.

" And then you went to Miami, New Arlean and Dallas?" asked Mars.

" YES, YES! But how did you know?!" asked Plutonium.

" You'd be surprised." said Mars and started laying on the stage. " And then he caught you in _Niagara Falls_..." Mars said.

" _**NIAGARA FALLS!**_" Plutonium shouted. Mars panicked again. " Slowly I Turn! And Step-by-step...inch-by-inch...And I picked him up! And I slapped him, I hit him, I punched him, I tear him to pieces...and then I knocked him down!" said Plutonium. Mars got up again. " What have I done? Blood! Everywhere! _**BLOOOOOOD!**_" Plutonium panicked and all of a sudden, He saw Bombard. " YOU!" said Plutonium.

" Oh! There you are, Plutonium!" said Bombard. They got closer and...they shook hands.

" Hiya, pal!" they both said.

" I almost caught up with you in Pittsburgh." Bombard smiles.

" Go ahead. Tell him what happened." said Mars.

" Forget it! It's past history!" said Plutonium.

" Why, you cowards! You're afraid to say _Niagara Falls!_" said Mars.

" **NIAGARA FALLS!**" said Bombard and Plutonium. Mars barked and panicked. " Slowly we turn! And step-by-step...Inch-by-inch!" said Bombard and Plutonium and they chase Mars. The routine ended and everyone is amazed.

" That was amazing!" said Tenki.

" Yeah! Even if they're actors, they did a good job!" said Hikari. Just then, Asagi appeared with a note.

" Jumbo, This note came." said Asagi. Jumbo read the note.

" _Car broke down, can't make it to the show. Sorry._" Jumbo is now in a pickle. Everyone is concern. The boys walked up to Jumbo.

" Well, Mr. Takeda?" said Bombard.

" Boys, I'm in trouble. How am I gonna get the show started?" asked Jumbo. Then, They had another idea.

" Don't worry, Mr. Takeda. We got the perfect idea! We'll all go on!" said Bombard.

" Yeah, We'll dance." said Maru.

" Certainly! We'll give them a show!" said Mars. Jumbo likes that idea.

" Alright! Good luck!" Jumbo smiled and everyone got ready. At the show, first off was Tenki, Maru and Hikari's dance performance. After performance, It's Bombard, Plutonium and Mars' turn to perform. The show starts with them, sleeping when the general appeared.

" Ten-hut!" said the general and the boys got up. " Boys, this mission is important. Whoever the person volunteered won't come back." said the general and the boys were scared. " So there is a brave man, ready for the mission, please step forward." said the general. Bombard and Plutonium took a step back, leaving Mars behind. " Thank you, my boy." said the general, shaking Mars' hand.

" Thank you for what, sir?" asked Mars.

" For dying to your country." said the general and Mars was frightened. " Now take this message to Colonel Hirakasa. He needs it to help the army. Now you go over to Skeleton pass, over Murder meadow, and across No-Man's land. Then you follow to Poison creek, and head directly...for Dead Man's Gulch. Now saddle the horse and be on your way." said the general.

" Yes, sir!" said Mars and left for the mission.

" Be sure to watch him if he's in trouble." said the general and left. Then the tense moment happened, Plutonium looks with the binoculars.

" There he goes! He's in enemy territory! He's crossing No-Man's Land! Look at him, riding down like a bullet! Oh no! He's down! They got him!" said Plutonium. Bombard looks in the binoculars.

" No, his horse is getting up now. Look at him, riding down like a bullet! He's riding! He's riding! He's riding!" said Bombard. But then...

" Hey, fellas! How do you saddle a horse?" said Mars and the show finally ended. And everyone was amazed. The boys bow down.

" Ah, boys! That was swell! You're in my new broad way show! Meet me there tomorrow!" Jumbo smiled.

" Oh boy! Broad way!" said Bombard.

" A break at last!" said Plutonium.

" Well, girls, It was nice, knowing ya! See ya again sometimes!" said Bombard. But the girls disagree.

" Oh yeah?!" said the girls and hits the boys on the head. Later, They're married. And they're traveling. But now, they're lost.

" Hey, where are we?" asked Bombard.

" I don't know." said Mars.

" Well get up there and check, where we going!" said Bombard and Mars got out.

" I'll go too." said Maru. Just then Mars look at the sign. " Where are we, dear?" asked Maru.

" Goslow!" said Mars. 

" Goslow?" said Maru and looked at the sign. " Silly, It saids _Go Slow._" said Maru. Just then, Mars took a look at the back of the sign and it saids _25 miles to Niagara Falls._ They got back to the car.

" Hey! What does that sign say?" asked Bombard.

" _25 miles to Niagara Falls._" And Mars accidentally said.

" _Niagara Falls!_" All except Mars said. Mars panicked. " Slowly we turn...And step-by-step...inch-by-inch..." and they chase Mars down the road.

THE END

Sonic-Yuji Naka ©1991-2014

Azumanga Daioh-Kiyohiko Azuma ©1999-2002

The Three Stooges-Ted Healy ©1925-1975

Yotsuba&!-Kiyohiko Azuma ©2003-2014

Bombard, Plutonium, Mars, Tenki, Maru & Hikari-Danny Emory ©2014

01/24/2014


End file.
